Image: Francesco Carta fotografo / Moment / Getty Images
About This Quiz
Tell us the truth: Are you normal? Or are you weird AF, #weirdgoals or stealth-weird?Â
If you're weird AF, you come across as weird to others because you don't know how to act normal. You really want other people to think you're just like them, but they see through your "human" act to the alien visitor lurking below. #Weirdgoals people, on the other hand, DGAF if people think they're normal or not, which is why everyone is obsessed with them. (Looking at you, Rihanna.) But honestly, who are these cool strangers, and why won't they be best friends with us?
If you're stealth-weird, you seem normal, but when you're alone, you're stranger than Nicolas Cage petting a dusty old possum. After you get home and are away from the prying eyes of the world, you indulge in utterly bizarre habits, such as never cleaning your bathroom, eating fried chicken with a fork and drinking La Croix in the shower. Not to call you out, but is this you?
If you're dying to find out just how normal (or weird) you are, gratify that thirst by taking this quiz! We can't guarantee you'll love the results, but those who insist on spilling the tea often get burned.😜 Good luck!
How do you clean your body?
Um, normally? With a washcloth.
I take a lot of baths. Long, lukewarm baths!
Lately, I'm enjoying yuzu body milks.
Bar soap, bro.
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Which of these foods would you eat with a fork and knife?
A pork chop
Pizza
Corn on the cob
Fried chicken
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Do you ever put on a sheet mask and pretend to be Hannibal Lecter?
No!
Yuh!
Weird flex, but maybe I'll try it.
Great idea!
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At what point in the day do you get dressed for bed?
At bedtime, of course. That's around 11 on weeknights.
8 p.m. Just like Grandma!
I don't really "dress for bed."
As soon as I'm home from work.
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Have you ever put raisins in a salad?
Heck no, girl.
They're a tasty treat!
Seems extra.
Maybe salad's just another form of dessert?
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When someone asks you how you are, what do you say?
"I'm Gucci. You?"
I tell them everything that's going on with me, up to and including any embarrassing minor health problems.
Depends on what my vibe is that day.
"I am fine, human. How are you?"
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Remember when Jughead acted SO SASSY about being a "weirdo" on "Riverdale"? What was that about?
In case you haven't noticed, he's WEIRD.
He's a weirdo. He doesn't FIT IN.
Have you ever seen him without that stupid HAT on? That's weird.
Jughead actually seems to be pretty popular, so that speech made no sense to me?
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Would you low-key die for your dog (or any dog)???
No, but I do love woofers!!!!!
WHICH DOG DO YOU NEED ME TO DIE FOR? I'M ON IT!
I'd absolutely die for my own dog.
No. I don't even like dogs. I SAID WHAT I SAID.
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How often do laundry fails force you to wear swimsuit bottoms as underwear?
IDK, like once a year?
YOU DON'T KNOW MY LIFE.
I wear swimsuit bottoms as undies all the time. What of it?
You're assuming I wear underwear, bruh.
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You're on a date with someone who intimidates you. Do you find yourself accidentally talking about past partners, almost as if you're trying to turn your date off?
Uh, no. That seems really self-destructive?
Yup, I do this all the time!
Only if I didn't want it to work out.
Ha! As if I've ever been on a "date."
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Have you ever dipped your fingers into hot candle wax for fun?
Why would I ever do such a thing?
Haha, yes. It's the best.
Yes. Then I call my fingers "my wax babies."
I don't do it in public, but can't resist it when I'm alone!
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Are you more freaky or geeky?
Neither. I'm vanilla, TBH!
I'm freakier than a dragon's booty.
I'm my own planet.
I'm geekier than a D&D Meetup.
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Do you occasionally avoid peeing because you don't want to stop doing something more interesting?
OMG, that's so bad for you.
Well, it is an interruption...
I know the feeling, but no.
"Not peeing" is a lifestyle choice (and I've made it)!
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Have you ever tried to learn a magic trick?
That's a big "no."
I have mastered many magic tricks, sir.
No, but if you wanna do that, I won't hate.
Yeah. Tried and failed.
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Be real: Do you believe that you're psychic?
No. I only believe in what I can see and feel.
I AM psychic, bish!
I'm probably psychic, but whatever. It's NBD.
Yes, but I don't want to talk about it because what if the government tries to study me???
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Do you keep your email inbox totally clean all the time?
Who has the time?
Of course. A clean inbox is the sign of a squeaky-clean MIND.
My inbox is bursting at the seams, fam.
No, but sometimes I set a timer and try to clear as many emails as I can. It's SUPER fun.
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Have you ever drunk a soda or cup of coffee while showering?
Ew, no?
Yuh. I like the contrast between a hot shower and a cold drink (and also vice-versa.)
No, but now I'm considering it.
Can't take a shower without Grapefruit La Croix.
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Are your Instagram stories mostly just pictures of all the weird abandoned chairs you spot?
Of course not. I mostly post pics of my partner, family and friends.
How did you know?
Nah, but that's a good idea for a Finsta.
No, it's mostly pics of Barbie's I've "altered."
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How many make-up YouTubers are you obsessed with?
I like Wayne Goss's eyebrow tutorials.
IDK, nine or ten!
15-16, but to be honest, a lot of them are my friends so I have to.
I'm only obsessed with the s p o o k y ones.
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Which of these weird TV shows most resembles your life?
"The Adventures of Pete & Pete"
"The Mighty Boosh"
"Halt and Catch Fire"
"Twin Peaks"
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Just between us, have you ever eaten an entire jar of pickles or olives in one sitting?
Nah. Too much sodium!
Mmm. You're making me hungry.
Just because you can do something, doesn't mean you should do something.
Now that's what I call dinner!
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Do you like eating food in the bathtub? What kind?
Food in the bathroom is extra.
Basically anything. Mashed potatoes, chicken pot pie, whatever.
Little salty snacks. Ice cream if life is getting raw.
I like eating soup in the tub because it's "ironic."
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What's your position on toe rings?
Not a fan!
They are quite sensual, actually.
I don't hate them.
I'm utterly foot-phobic and cannot handle them.
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Have you ever tried to dye a pet's coat with beet juice? (P.S. That is a safe way to dye pet's hair!)
WHUT?
Yes. I dyed my cat pink and it was lit.
No, but I have dyed my own hair with Kool-Aid.
I wanted a dog with a pink tail, and I got a dog with a pink tail. Facts!
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Yesterday at school, your biggest frenemy said you were weird. How will you get back at her?
I won't. Negative people always drag themselves down on their own.
I'll tell her off in my mind a thousand times but end up doing nothing.
I'll steal her bf or gf.
I'll hack into the school's computers and change all her grades to D's.
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When your web cam is on and you're talking to someone via Skype or Zoom, do you spend the whole time checking out your picture in the corner of the screen?
Nope, that's rude.
Yup. Come on, it's fascinating.
OOF. That's very tacky.
No, but I do practice dancing in front of the mirror. That's not weird, right?
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How often do you clean your bathroom?
Once every two weeks
Every day, baby!
I have never cleaned it. I wait for other people to do it and eventually they do.
I have never cleaned it and ... no one else has either. It seems fine?
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Do you secretly wish your mom would buy you a weighted blanket for Christmas?
Again: WHUT?
Yaas!
Actually, the minute I wanted one, I went ahead and bought it for myself.
Yes. Please tell my mommy I said so.
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Have you ever called a black cat a "void boy"?
I do not relate to this content.
That's the proper name for black cats, isn't it?
I did once and now it's a meme. (Eyeroll.)
No, but whenever I see a black cat, I whisper it in my mind.
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Who's the weirdest person you'd make out with?
A (young) beekeeper
My third cousin
Christopher Meloni from "SVU"
The Property Brothers. Either one or both, TBH.
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You Got: