How Cray-Cray Are You?

By: Zoe Samuel
Estimated Completion Time
7 min
How Cray-Cray Are You?
Image: Xsandra/E+/Getty Images

About This Quiz

Sanity is an idea as young as modern mental hygiene, or as the kids say these days "momenhi". No, that last bit is obviously made up, but then, so is every term we use to describe the inner workings of the mind. Since the early endeavors of Carl Jung and Sigmund Freud, personality disorders, neuroses and other maladies of the mind made the leap from "imbalances of the humours" and "demonic possession" to medical conditions. This required new terms! Maybe back in the days of Jung, "id" "ego" and "superego" were all hip terms, like "PWN" or "FOMO."

Today, we have physicians to diagnose the specifics of mental problems, but for the rest of us, the shorthand remains. Words like "lunatic" used to be de rigueur when colorfully describing insanity. The term came from the suggestion that bouts of mental illness came about due to the phases of the moon ("luna"). Today, that's too many syllables, as is "crazy." Rather, we use shorthand for the shorthand. Cray, or if we reference someone truly nuts, cray-cray.

Our standards for what constitutes crazy have also changed significantly. Now, some behaviors are considered eccentric, but would have been deemed crazy just 10 years ago. Conversely, other acts which would have been fine a decade ago are today considered completely nuts! Are you cray-cray? Time to take this quiz and find out!

What would you wear every day if no one at work cared what clothes you wore?
I'd wear something neutral and respectful, but not flashy. Something comfortable.
I'd go nude.
The clothes I wear while clubbing!
I'd wear shirts with offensive messages every day.

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What time would you turn up to a party scheduled to start at 7:30 p.m.?
7:45 p.m., to be respectful
7 p.m. to help out
8 p.m. to be fashionably late
9:30 p.m. to shock everyone with my lateness

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You really like someone, but haven't told them. What medium should you use to let them know?
Why not just speak to them?
Call them, a lot
Messaging app
Skywriting

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With how many people do you share your streaming passwords?
None! I don't want anyone knowing any of my passwords!
Only one person, but I don't use the account myself. I use it to spy on what they watch.
All my besties!
I have that info posted on my social media profile for my friends to know.

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If you want to get in touch with someone who is the object of your affections, how many times should you call them if you don't hear back?
2, max
As many as it takes!
Call? What is this, the dark ages? FaceTime!
Don't ever call!

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What time should you turn up to a job interview?
A couple minutes early
An hour early
Exactly on time
20 minutes late

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How do you secure your online identity?
I use lots of different passwords, and change them frequently
I use the password 123456password because no one every guesses that!
I cycle through passwords that are my favorite drinks and favorite TV characters!
I just pay for an ID protection company and hope they handle it.

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What kind of party should you throw for someone's stag or hen night?
Something fun, and centered on producing a nice memory
Do something they hate, so their wedding will be extra fun!
Take them out to party until they can barely stand!
Go to a foreign country, prank them, get the guest of honor hammered and then abandon them in the woods.

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What do you ask of your friends when you have a milestone birthday coming up?
Donate something to a charity of my choice.
Donate something to a charity I am opposed to.
Rent out a club!
Do something fun, like skydiving!

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What's your idea of an adventurous vacation plan?
Go to a country I've never been to, without too much planned
Go to a country the State Dept. specifically says not to go to
Go someplace amazing, like Bali, Bermuda, or Ibiza!
Go on a real adventure, like climbing K2, or scuba diving with sharks!

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What would you love to do the most if you went to Hawaii on vaction?
Relax a lot!
See a volcano erupt!
Meet some local hotties!
Mountain bike down the side of an active volcano with an action cam!

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Which of these jobs sounds like something you'd really enjoy?
Creative executive; picking which movies get made!
Secretary of Agriculture, since I know nothing about the subject!
EVP of marketing for a Las Vegas resort!
CEO of Tesla!

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When someone you like gets into an argument with you, how do you handle it?
I try to cool things down a little, so emotions don't come into it.
I win! I win! I win!
I change the subject.
I try a totally left field argument, which either wins or loses the debate.

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How would you angle for a promotion at work?
Ask about what more I can do for my employer
Show how I can totally take Jeff, who has the job I want.
Take my boss out for a night of drinking and good times they may never fully remember!
Tell my boss that if I don't get promoted, I'll have to quit.

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How many AAA batteries do you have in your house, awaiting use right now?
Only about 6
Dozens! You can never have too many!
2, since I go through AAs for the most part ...
None. If I need one, I just steal it from an old remote!

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How long ago did the oldest expired food in your fridge expire?
A week ago! Crap!
There's nothing expired in there.
A month or so ago
I peel off expiration dates, because they're just a way the man tries to control us!

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If a new friend offered you food and you had no idea what it was or where it came from, how would you respond?
I'd refuse it.
I would eat it, and then bring it up later.
I'd taste it and if it's good, I'll eat it all.
I'll eat it and anything else I'm offered, no questions asked!

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How long would you keep the box from an appliance purchase?
A week or two
Decades
A month at most
I throw them away immediately!

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How many of the private details of your romantic relationships make it to social media?
None! Who do you take me for?
I post them all: every argument, every bit of praise.
I only post the positive stuff, but enough to make you sick!
I post all negative details, to test if this is really the one!

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How readily do you get into political arguments on social media?
It takes a lot to get me dragged into one.
I love that! It's my jam! I'll argue with you right now!
If it affects me personally, I'll do it.
I'll only do it if everyone else disagrees with me.

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What gift would you bring to a party host if you were a guest?
A box of chocolates. Everyone else will be bringing wine.
Something cool, like a life-size metal skull with Bible quotes engraved on it
Mixers!
Stuff for playing a game, like drunken mumblety-peg

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If you wanted to bring someone to a wedding, but your invitation did not include a plus one, what would you do?
Ask the people who invited me, and if they say no, or don't respond, I go solo.
I'll bring not just one extra person, but several!
Offer to pay for their place if there's no room, and bring some expensive booze for the party
Just bring them, and defy the dress code to boot!

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If your doctor told you to take up an active sport for your health, which one would you want to try?
Running
Juggling
Swimming
Cliff diving

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How do you keep track of all your passwords?
I use a password manager with a very, very long, complicated, difficult to crack password I keep memorized.
I write them down on the wall of the bathroom of my local pub.
I write them in my diary.
I use the same password for everything!

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How do you go about trying to get a raise?
Outperform, and do it so the boss sees. Ask what else I can do.
Demand it, while naked!
Try to find a way to make the whole team work better!
Fall on my sword for my boss!

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How much do you go into detail about your health when talking with friends at a party?
I don't! Ugh! Awful!
I tell them about every disgusting detail.
I only tell them the glamorous stuff, like how I hurt myself by being awesome at the gym.
I only tell them about the problems that are clearly due to my misbehavior.

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Which of these kinds of entertainment would you most want to take part in?
Watching a ballgame
Watching a bullfight
Watching a race
Watching an illegal underground fight

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Have you ever tried meditating to stay calm?
I don't really need it.
I tried. It didn't help.
It only helps when I do it every day, which I don't always.
Yes. It was actually great!

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What should you wear to a job interview?
What my potential boss wears to work
Whatever I darn well please!
What my boss would wear to the club!
Something cool, like a military uniform

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What TV helps you relax in the evening?
Superstore
RuPaul's Drag Race
Handmaid's Tale
The Walking Dead

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You Got: