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Where is the poison?
The cup in front of you.
The cup in front of me.
I haven't added the poison to either cup...yet.
I have no poison.
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How long will you take to get the Sicilian to give away his weakness?
As long as it takes.
What weakness? Aren't we just drinking wine?
A few minutes before I am bored.
He's already given it away.
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Are you someone who would put the poison in front of you?
Not a chance.
Maybe.
Probably to throw someone off.
I don't even know how to answer that.
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What is your opinion of Sicilians?
They are stinky.
They are witty.
They are intelligent.
They are confusing.
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Would you ever drink potentially poisoned wine that is sitting right in front of you?
Nope.
Perhaps.
I'd have to figure out if it were in front of me or not.
No clue.
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Would you trust a criminal from Australia?
Maybe, I like Aussies.
Well, they do have good beer.
Not at all.
Not sure. I've never met anyone from there.
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Which companion from "The Princess Bride" would you like at your side in battle?
Westley.
Inigo Montoya.
Fezzik.
Princess Buttercup.
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How do you go about making decisions?
Impulsively.
I take advice, but really just do what I feel is best.
Decisively and thought out ahead.
It varies on the circumstance.
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Do you have a poker tell?
I flick my earlobes.
I pick my nose and rub my boogers on the guy next to me.
I click my tongue.
I wink.
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Which of these philosophers would you consider a moron to your intellect?
Plato.
Aristotle.
Socrates.
You're kidding, right?
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How well do you think you'd hold up under torture?
Not well at all.
I was ready to spill the beans when I read this question.
I'm a rock.
I think I'd do okay. At least better than most.
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Which subject would you score best in on a quiz?
Chicken Rearing.
Poetry.
Medieval Torture Devices.
Lip Reading.
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What is the best way to defeat a giant in battle?
Wear him out with agility.
Bonking him in the head with a big rock.
Hang out with other giants.
Man, I hope I never have to deal with that.
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What is your sense of humor like?
I have an anxious sense of humor.
I have a sarcastic sense of humor.
I have a great wit.
I'm fairly good at slapstick comedy.
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Do you enjoy word games such as "Scrabble" or "Words With Friends?"
No, they suck.
I am not a wordsmith, but I enjoy them.
I usually play with people worse than me, so yeah, they're cool.
I didn't even know that was a thing.
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Which food or drink would you use to hide the poison that you'll use on the Sicilian?
I'd dab it in applesauce.
I'd pour it in porridge.
Wine.
I might serve grits with a side of poison.
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You have a chance to flee and save yourself or stay to help others. What do you do?
My mind says leave, but my body wants to fight.
I stay and help others.
I save my own skin.
I can't think of any situation in my life where I would have to make thta decision.
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What do you think Vizzini's strongest character trait is?
His dizzying intellect.
His inhibitions.
His leadership skills.
His confidence.
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Which of these board games would you play to the death?
Chess.
Checkers.
Mancala.
Really? Are you crazy? A board game to the death?
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Why is a Sicilian challenging you to the death?
I insulted his mother.
He is jealous of my abilities.
It's been a long time coming. Let's do this!
No clue.
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Why would you accept a challenge to the death?
I don't have anything else going on today.
To save face.
I, too, am confident.
I wouldn't.
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Which medieval job would you have?
I'd be a merchant.
I'd be an assassin.
I'd be a pirate.
I'd be an entertainer.
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Do you think it would be cool to be a pirate?
I'd rather not be a pirate.
I'd consider it.
Only if the captain is cool.
Duh!
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When would you storm a castle?
Daybreak.
In the middle of the night.
Just as the sun sets.
During church.
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Why would you help a Sicilian start a war?
I am being threatened by said Sicilian.
All my friends are doing it.
I would not.
Because it's Sunday Funday!
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