Are You Ready to Enlist in the Military?

By: Zoe Samuel
Estimated Completion Time
5 min
Are You Ready to Enlist in the Military?
Image: WikiCommons

About This Quiz

As J.R.R. Tolkien put it in his trilogy "Lord of the Rings, "It's a dangerous business, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to."

Signing up for military service is a lot like this. You surrender a vast amount of control over your future and commit to obey any lawful order given to you by a powerful and thoroughly established hierarchy of men and women who may send you into harm's way at the drop of a hat. You could be deployed overseas and risk your life under heavy fire as you battle to secure the waterways and territories of the world for democracy, for our allies, and for people seeking to live their lives unmolested by tyrants and invaders.

Of course, you will get a lot of out of it. You'll earn new skills and travel to faraway lands. You'll get job security and a great pension with lifelong benefits. You'll make friends for life, and you'll know what it is to truly stretch yourself to your limits. You'll return stronger, wiser, and perhaps a little more cynical.

Are you ready to take the plunge? Let's find out!

Do you look good in white?
No, I need an ironic print, at least.
No, it gets dirty too easily.
You bet I do!
White is a little too "glow" if you know what I mean.

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Do you love to travel?
Nope! I like it in the USA!
Yes, I do, but I really like to spend time in places when I go there.
I love to travel, but I don't like to visit for too long.
I like to look at new and exciting places from 85,000 feet.

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Do you mind boredom?
Oh yeah. That's why I'm taking this quiz!
I don't mind it if I can keep myself busy.
I love boredom. Death isn't boring.
I don't mind it, but I like to keep things interesting.

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Do you mind danger?
I hate danger!
I love a little danger with my breakfast.
I'd like to have a lot of steel between me and danger.
I don't mind it, if I can have an influence on it.

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Do you mind low pay?
Yeah! If I'm putting my life on the line, I want to be well paid!
I don't mind low pay.
I don't mind it so long as I get to really see the world.
I don't mind it too much if there's a career waiting for me outside the service.

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Do you mind being told what to do?
I hate that! If I were okay with it, I'd have stayed in high school!
I don't mind. It means I have to think less.
I don't mind, because if a team is going to work, someone has to be in charge.
I don't mind, because I can't claim my perspective has all the information.

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Do you like confined spaces?
Only my own home.
I'd rather get outside if I can.
I like to think of them as "cozy".
I don't mind if the walls are glass.

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Do you like the desert?
No, too uncomfortable for me.
I don't mind at all!
No, to dry for me.
I don't mind how it looks from the air.

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Do you like the ocean?
Only on TV.
It's okay I guess.
It's awesome!
It's fine, but I'd rather just get to the other side.

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Do you want to continue with your job when you leave the military?
No, I want to run for office!
No, I think I'll just get on with a regular civilian job.
No, I'll just go to college.
Yes, I think it'd be cool to keep the same job in civilian form.

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Would you like to move from a regular military job to a DOD job?
I don't know what DOD is.
Maybe.
Does it mean I can keep traveling?
Sure! Sounds awesome!

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Do you want to live abroad?
Nope. I hate it there.
Not for more than a year.
Yeah! I don't know if I want to really live "in" a country though.
Absolutely. It sounds like an adventure.

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Do you like long walks?
No, this is why I have a car.
Sure, I find them invigorating.
No, I'd rather just cruise by.
Not fast enough for me.

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How dependent on technology are you?
Totally! I couldn't get through the day without my smart toaster.
I can get by with a knife and a piece of flint.
I just need the basics of modern life.
I can do without it, but I love some good tech.

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Do you like the idea of parachuting?
I only want to watch that on YouTube.
Sure! Why not?
It might be fun, once.
I'll do it all the time! It's awesome!

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Do you mind if you don't get all the glory?
No! I need glory!
I don't mind.
I'd rather not have glory.
I want to be covered in glory.

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Do you look good in gray?
No, I need color!
No, it's too bright.
No, it's not bright enough.
Yes! That's my jam!

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Do you mind getting dirty?
Ew! Yucky!
I love it!
No thanks, I hate having to wash up.
I don't mind getting sweaty, but that's all.

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Do you mind getting soaked?
Yes! If I wanted to get wet, I'd get in the pool.
If it comes to it.
I don't mind at all!
Ugh, I'd rather avoid it, but if I have to...

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Do you mind passing out from G-forces?
Oh God! That sounds like torture!
I'd rather not.
Yes, I'd rather pass out from drunkenness.
No! That sounds like a rush!

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Are you afraid of heights?
I can't even climb a step stool.
I can climb a tree okay.
I don't mind standing on the edge of a high building.
I'm not afraid at all.

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Do you like to do things the old fashioned way?
No, that's because there's a new way!
If I can.
It's good to know how, just in case.
Not if I can help it.

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What do you need to navigate?
My iPad.
A magnet.
A string, a stick, and a weight.
A map.

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How much money is enough money to risk your life?
$1 Million.
$30,000.
$24,000.
$60,000.

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Do you have family in the military?
Nope.
Yes, I do, going back many generations.
I have a couple generations of that.
Just my parents' generation.

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Do you like big canons?
Not when they get fired! They're loud!
I like small canons I can hold in my hands!
I love big canons! The bigger, the better!
I love a good Vulcan!

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Do you like smart weaponry?
Well, I like my smart phone!
I like to keep things uncomplicated.
It sounds pretty good to me.
There's no substitute for a steely eyed missile man.

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Do you look good in blue?
Not even blue jeans.
That's my color!
It's too dark, too morbid.
But I've invested so heavily in other colors!

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Are you interested in intelligence gathering?
But I want to blow things up!
I'd rather just act, not look around.
Cool, but what do I have to do?
That sounds awesome!

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Do you want to help regular people?
No! I'm not up for the Peace Corps!
Sure! I love helping people!
I want to help in the most efficient ways possible.
I suppose, but it's not really my strong suit.

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You Got: